Levels 1-3 of Learning

We begin this world and for many years to come in a state of dependence, which is a level 1 of learning called Unconscious incompetence. This is where we need and rely on our parents to help us grow physically, emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually.

After we are taught and from watching our parents, family, teachers, instructors, community, and so forth we enter an interdependent state. In this space, we are at level two of learning which is conscience incompetence. Cleaning our room without being asked, doing our chores without being asked and performing the task with skill, helping where needed, learning safety rules, manners, and etiquette, taking care of our hygiene, and controlling our thoughts, words, and actions by working through mindfulness. Not perfect yet in things but figuring it all out.

Moving onto level three of learning which is Conscience Competence. Perhaps we’ve had some personal experiences along the way to help mold us into good, better, and best humans. As we progress with age, responsibility, and authority, we become independent. By now not living with one’s parents, making an income to support our needs, and perhaps with a spouse or if not married yet living alone or with roommates, saving money on expenses. Nonetheless, we’ve entered a state of independence.

Not sure what that magical number is for everyone. For myself, it was age 19. Rare at age 18 and others happen later even in the mid to upwards twenties. This magical age of complete independence is when one stops getting constant benefits from the parents like living expenses, use of car or car insurance under their name, as well as medical insurance, or food or money handouts, all this stops, just completely and utterly independent with full authority of self and in charge of one’s life.

Blinn College & Texas A&M University

I’ve taught College kids for over thirty years. I loved watching half this group grow into an independent state rather quickly taking on the responsibility of making money, being frugal, riding a bicycle, or walking, and telling me stories of how they are saving money and working while in school as well as taking care of their health and morality. This group took responsibility and developed discipline, and integrity in word and action.

The other half of this group I had a different approach, and it wasn’t fully their fault. However, these kids relied on parents to pay for everything, even eating out at pricey restaurants, including some who would spend their parents’ funds on frivolous shopping, daily coffees and treats, and bar scenes buying alcohol. Spending parent’s money on events, travel, food trucks, parties, and even giving to friends. As crazy as that was to me, that didn’t stun me as much as the lack of communication and lack of responsibility that was absent, as they allowed the parents to do this job for them. This also took away wildly important moments that would have aided in them becoming more independent much sooner.

I have true stories where parents would walk in with the fully grown college kid standing right behind them and telling me they weren’t able to test, or they didn’t like a score they received or training was too hard, or they couldn’t come to work because a girlfriend’s cat peed on them, or they were just going out of town. Even a few stood in front of these college kids asking if I would be a good reference for them on a resume, or questions about work hours and pay schedules.

I would look behind the parents of my student or staff member where they would be almost hiding, and they would not give me eyesight. They soon learned how I felt about that, which wasn’t good.

I do love discipline, work ethic, a sense of pride, I love integrity, and someone who takes responsibility for one’s actions. I admire a communicator who appreciates other’s time and what is considered as Jim Collins puts it, a Clock Builder vs a Time Stealer!

As I shared, the magical number for all varies, but I feel strongly that one may be at a level two or three of learning and yet still have self-respect, be a person of integrity, and communicate with emphatic listening.

Level of Four of Learning

The fourth level of learning is called unconscious competence. By now driving, working, perhaps raising a family, buying one’s own clothes, food, and household expenses. Here, we exercise, cook, clean, join an organization, spend time on a hobby, work within a budget, prioritize, develop characteristics and habits from the structure of our lives, know how to do our job, and so forth. This level is knowing how to do these things. Naturally, when we come to new areas, people, places, and things we intelligently work to a level four with Mastery in mind. Learning never stops and that is the beauty of it all as I believe we are here to learn. The path to this road is called Self Reliant. Self-reliance is being prepared and knowing what to do when that time comes.

The slight difference in the meaning of self-reliance and independence is that self-reliance is reliance on one’s powers and resources rather than those of others. Independence is free from outside control; not depending on another’s authority, not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence. I believe self-reliance is a step above independence. You can be free from outside control and still not know how to do something.

My take is that I would rather you know how to do something so when that time comes in your life you are prepared. I am speaking mainly of life skills, survival skills, safety skills, and even self-defense skills.

I may not want to have to change my tire, but if a tire shop isn’t around where I can drive to and pay them for a service, I need this skill. You can create multiple possibilities where being self-reliant is key. I once read in the book The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success that Good Luck simply means preparedness and opportunity. Now I would not say that having a flat tire is an opportunity but when one is prepared with the tools and knows how to do a thing then you have provided the desired outcome.

Weekly Self Reliance Classes

I was asked by my church leaders if I would help others in my area to be self-reliant. At first, the few requests I was given were to share resources in job openings and food or money assistance. I did my research and had a list readily available for anyone who asked. I thought about this, the more I felt that by doing the research for that person I would be like the college kid parent who asked all the questions, and this method didn’t seem like a good way to teach self-reliance. So, I was prepared for a new approach when someone asked me for a list, I would then share with them how they could find the information as I did.

Many months went by, and I felt I was not serving in all my capacity. Just waiting around for someone who is in need doesn’t seem like I am developing this calling to its full potential. So, I had a mindset shift and decided to put together a list of topics from A to Z and put together a weekly class, yes weekly, and have the class for an hour, an hour and a half, or two hours depending on the topic and invite not only church members but the entire community.

When I was growing up in the martial arts, at an early age I embraced the creed designed by Grand Master Jhoon Rhee which is to build a strong and happy community. I have added words to this mindset: healthy, and safe. I do desire to build a strong, happy, healthy, and safe community. However, am I expecting someone else to perform this, to develop this? If so then I am a hypocrite in my teachings and thinking, also it would take me back to a dependent state.

This goes against my principles, having or relying on someone else to do a job I am designed for, and my desire to achieve the goal. It does take a village, but if you build it, they will come, right? Let’s hope so! I have attained self-reliant skills and perfected them over time; in numerous areas, I can confidently say that I am at level four of learning. As a result, I shall practice Covey Habit 8, when you find your voice, inspire others to find theirs. This self-reliant independence in motion creates synergy.

I wouldn’t be a person of integrity if I lived this type of life at a lower level of learning when an opportunity arises. I love to communicate, and I consider myself a clock builder, therefore I will do my work to help develop this as that is the outcome I desire for my environment, surroundings, and my community. Knowledge in the mind, honesty in the heart, strength in the body, keeping friendships with one another, never fighting to achieve selfish ends, and building a strong, happy, healthy, and safe community. Therefore, I will practice the Law of Sacrifice and offer an opportunity & preparedness class for others to come learn, practice, develop, and execute self-reliance in all its skills.

How it’s Going

So far classes are going well. I have shared what I am teaching to church members each week via weekly announcements and on the church’s Facebook page. I have also shared the class details each week on all my social media platforms and have begun inviting friends, colleagues, neighbors, family, and even strangers to the classes.

I am excited for the growth that is to come of this class and its works, fulfill my calling, and actively and anxiously engage in what I am doing for my community.

Here is a list of upcoming classes; however, this is just the start. I must sleep at some point, and in all things, there is to balance, Nonetheless, if you are local, I invite you to join me and share this message, let’s grow together!

Self Reliance Topics A to Z

Being vigilant, utilizing common objects for personal defense, and using your environment to your advantage. Personal self-defense vs single attacker vs double attacker, child protection defense simulated hands-on exercise, 3rd party protection, keychain personal protection, rolled up magazine personal protection. Personal defense against a ground takedown. Defending against an on-the-ground position. How to get up safely from the ground vs single or multiple attackers. Home intruder safety 101. Firearm safety, Clear the house, firearm retention, knife safety, knife defense, knife retention, club defense, and club counter defense. Proper Breathing skills for exercise and lung development. Physical fitness at any level.  How to journal with instant topics. How to make delicious food with food scraps, how to make compost, how to make homemade soap, and detergent, planting, caring for, and growing seedlings. Low-budget decorating. Self-care, oral hygiene care, hair care, how to organize your closet & drawers making time efficient. Variety of exercise balance to be well rounded. Making a fancy ornament for little funds. How to build a relationship with the community.  How to make some extra cash flipping finds. Volunteering and the benefits. How to properly store fruits and vegetables for freshness and longevity. Make a beautiful & lasting gift for $1.50. How to share good news and things that interest you for all the see. Cooking, Crafting, Decorating, Personal Defense, Family History, and finding your roots. Scripture & book reading/study. How to write a book, journal, and more.

I would love to read your feedback, please subscribe, like, and share, and come back for the next part of Renee Nolte World, Might for Right, leading by example. Amen!